Burch: Batman and Robin take on Tennessee arch-villain

Thursday, June 6, 2013 at 10:05pm
By Michael R. Burch

Holy cow, Batman! According to the bat-computer a new arch-villain is afoot! It just forwarded us a report by Daily Kos about a Republican congressman who “rants from the House floor” that the poor shouldn't be allowed to spend “other people's money.” And yet he’s received nearly $3.5 million in federal government handouts, and is clearly planning to grab even more!

Robin, it should come as no surprise that the hypocrite in question is yet another Tennessee holy roller, Rep. Stephen Fincher. I know the type well. During a recent gathering at a Memphis Holiday Inn, Fincher explained his position on food stamps by saying: “The role of citizens, of Christians, of humanity is to take care of each other, but not for Washington to steal from those in the country and give to others in the country.” But it turns out that Fincher has taken $3.48 million in taxpayer subsidies from 1999 to 2012, according to figures compiled by the Environmental Working Group. He seems to love spending other people’s money, as long as he’s the beneficiary, not someone truly in need. In fact, Fincher is the second-most-subsidized member of Congress. Only Doug LaMalfa (R-Calif.) has received more federal farm aid, $4.9 million since 1995.

Holy bill of rights, Batman! While he may play second fiddle to LaMalfa in Congress, as Forbes pointed out, Fincher “has the distinction of being one of the largest recipients of subsidies in the history of the great State of Tennessee.” Isn’t it ironic that the Tennessean preaching the loudest, fieriest sermons about not spending other people’s money is the one cashing the biggest, fattest government checks?

Robin, I am not at all surprised. Tennessee has become a seed bed of Tea Party fundamentalism. According to Forbes, Fincher is “on a mission from God.” How does he intend to serve God and country? Well, “Armed with an array of proverbs and quotes from the Holy Bible, Congressman Fincher is pressing his fight to dramatically curtail the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP) — better known to most Americans as food stamps — relied upon by 47 million Americans for some or all of their daily sustenance.”

Holy starving children, Batman! Fincher’s government windfall of $70,000 in 2012 not only dwarfs the average Tennessee 2012 SNAP benefit of $1,586, but is nearly double Tennessee's median household income. And yet, after voting to cut SNAP by more than $20 billion, Fincher supported a proposal to expand crop insurance subsidies by nine billion dollars over the next ten years. Even worse, the insurance subsidies are not currently disclosed, so we may never know how much more money Fincher and his cronies are voting into their pocketbooks, at the taxpayers’ expense!

Robin, unfortunately things get even worse. The EWG report points out that food stamp benefits are restricted to families below specified income levels, but there are no such limits on crop insurance subsidies. As a result, in a single year some 10,000 farmers earned more than $100K, while 26 pocketed more than a cool million! Unsurprisingly, a number of the beneficiaries are seated in Congress, and are actively pursuing for even larger, undisclosed handouts.

Yikes, Batman! I’m reminded of some observations Mark Twain made about Congress:

“Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.”

“There is no distinctly native American criminal class except Congress.”

“All Congresses and Parliaments have a kindly feeling for idiots, and a compassion for them, on account of personal experience and heredity.”

Robin, perhaps worst of all, we can’t bring these creeps to justice, because they create the laws. Unfortunately, our hands are tied. Only Tennessee’s voters can put criminal masterminds like Stephen Fincher out of commission.

Holy strawberries Batman! We're in a real jam! Let’s hope Tennesseans have the sense to do the right thing, by putting a lid on the Tea Party before it explodes and innocent children suffer!

Michael R. Burch is a Nashville-based editor and publisher of Holocaust poetry and other “things literary” at www.thehypertexts.com.

Filed under: City Voices

37 Comments on this post:

By: Captain Nemo on 6/7/13 at 4:52

There should be no surprise that a Republican would demand that the poor should never get free money, when that same free money could go to him.

Isn’t that Raspy old boy.

By: Loner on 6/7/13 at 5:50

Another expose of another sleazy Christian hypocrite...I love it...keep up the good work, Mike Burch...these mean-spirited holy rollers need to be publicly defrocked.

I suppose that Reverend Fincher cold point to Jesus of Nazareth and say that Jesus never was on food stamps and he never approved of them; therefore they are ungodly and satanic in nature.

Apparently, Jesus of Nazareth approved of paying farmers not to farm, to keep prices up.

Fincher probably believes that Jesus carried a sword, a dagger, bronze knuckles and a garrote on his person at all times....such is the extent of their heresy and self-delusion.

Give 'em Hell, Mike Burch.

By: govskeptic on 6/7/13 at 6:33

Holy batsh*t what an editorial as the most important subject of June 7th. The fact
there's nothing about Flying J/Pilot or the Government's collection of Private phone
calls and numbers of the citizenry, except for a few Senators who didn't dare share
that with the public, is something truly worth writing about. These Tenn Democratic
Party position papers every Friday have become a real bore, but we will see next
year if they have born any desired fruit.

By: Blanketnazi2 on 6/7/13 at 6:39

Well, gov - you can always tune in to Fox News if this isn't your cup of "tea."

By: Loner on 6/7/13 at 6:42

I should have added "bull-whip" to my list of weapons that Jesus of Nazareth was known to have carried with him...he whupped some ass in the temple....we know that....but, sadly, using a bull-whip in a Jewish temple was a hangin' offense at the time.

By: Captain Nemo on 6/7/13 at 6:43


By: Captain Nemo on 6/7/13 at 6:48

Here you go Loner. lol


By: Rocket99 on 6/7/13 at 7:03

Apparently gov doesn't like it when Repubs get called out.

Fincher needs to go. He's a true disgrace.

By: Blanketnazi2 on 6/7/13 at 7:05

I agree, Rocket.

By: Captain Nemo on 6/7/13 at 7:19

The people on the right wing seem to think that they can do no wrong. That it is just great to say they want small government as long as they think it will keep the left under control. However when they find that the law to keep the left under control has in fact put a leash on them , then it is too late.

By: Captain Nemo on 6/7/13 at 7:48

“The past can't hurt you anymore. Not unless you let it. They made you into a victim, Evey. They made you into a statistic. But, that's not the real you. That's not who you are inside.”
― Alan Moore, V for Vendetta

By: Loner on 6/7/13 at 8:17

Love that Rambo Jesus image, Captain....we know that Christ loved to smash things and create a ruckus. If he had one, he might have used an AK-47, not a bullwhip on the temple money-changers and the dove & goat sales personnel?

A Roman SWAT team should have come in and stopped the terrorist act in the temple?

By: Captain Nemo on 6/7/13 at 10:42

Thanks Loner. The fringe is Coo Coo for Corn Puff crap.

By: pswindle on 6/7/13 at 11:50

Fincher is just another fool that takes what he can get from the less fortunate, and lines his money with federal money But TN will stand by their man because he is a republican. Just like that stand by Haslam.

By: bfra on 6/7/13 at 11:55

I don't stand by Haslam! I think he is more crooked than his brother because he is trying to paint himself as being so honest.

By: govskeptic on 6/7/13 at 2:41

I could truly careless about Fincher. Don't know anything other than he's from a
place called FrogJump or something similar. Now, for the Nazi, how about something original from yourself versus the exaggerations from the extreme left wing
publications you always use. Personalized Critic on this site are a dime a dozen.

By: Blanketnazi2 on 6/7/13 at 2:53

Exaggerations from the extreme left? That's hilarious. It doesn't take a quote from an extreme left publication to see that Fincher is a douche and a hypocrite. As a Christian I figured you'd be outraged. I guess not - same as it ever was, aye, gov?

By: Blanketnazi2 on 6/7/13 at 2:53

Somehow I have a feeling you would care more if a left leaning representative behaved in the same manner.

By: brrrrk on 6/7/13 at 3:22

Blanketnazi2 said

"That's hilarious. It doesn't take a quote from an extreme left publication to see that Fincher is a douche and a hypocrite."

Anyone who knowingly crafts and votes in favor of legislation that gives him and his family unneeded tax benefits while at the same time takes food out the mouths of needy children (using out of context scripture to justify his actions) is the true definition of a hypocritical douche. Congress is the only place where you don't need to recuse yourself from being on committees where you can lobby for bills that are in your own best interests..... that should stop. Judges can't listen to cases where there may be a conflict of interest, so why shouldn't Congress be held to the same standard?

By: Captain Nemo on 6/8/13 at 7:55

A douche bag, is a douche bag left or right.

By: yogiman on 6/8/13 at 11:18

Is that what you use for your crap, dumba$$?

By: bfra on 6/8/13 at 11:26

Douche bag trolls have ruined this forum! Speaking of which, one just regurgitated more of his crap at 12:18PM.

By: yogiman on 6/8/13 at 2:10

Sorry, I thought I was quoting you.

By: bfra on 6/8/13 at 2:58

yogi - Another LIE! Quoting me from where? But then, maybe you are too stupid to know what quote means.

By: yogiman on 6/8/13 at 3:58


I not only know what quotes mean, I also know what facetious comments mean... and I also know what your ignorant remarks mean.

You should actually learn what you mean when you're thinking it instead of exposing you idiocy so often.

By: Captain Nemo on 6/8/13 at 4:05

Stupid yogi. Want to say to my face.

By: Captain Nemo on 6/8/13 at 4:15

Sure you do yogi, you always say and do stupid quotes and confuse your face for your butt. Dumb-ass son of a dumb-ass sheriff.

By: yogiman on 6/8/13 at 11:38


I honestly believe you are the most stupid person I've ever noted on this site. You're so willing to make such stupid remarks about subject you have know knowledge of. That, dumba$$, is pure ignorance and you're proving it more every day.

By: Loner on 6/9/13 at 6:52

This litterbox is full....filled with catty excrement....take it out and dump it.

By: Captain Nemo on 6/9/13 at 8:10

With only a half a brain and it being crap, you can't see that you are the stupidest man, yogi.

You are far a bigger dumb-ass than your daddy.

By: Captain Nemo on 6/9/13 at 8:10

With only a half a brain and it being crap, you can't see that you are the stupidest man, yogi.

You are far a bigger dumb-ass than your daddy.

By: Captain Nemo on 6/9/13 at 8:14

As long as any of us comment on anything yogi post, the litter box will remain filled, Loner. I have tried to ignore him many times, but you are someone else keeps baiting that old fool.

By: bfra on 6/9/13 at 9:27

Nemo - I agree 100%! However, when there is a dumber than dirt troll that post nothing but LIES, it's hard to ignore.

By: yogiman on 6/9/13 at 9:35

Well, dumba$$, and you too, bfra,

I may be an old fool to your feeble minds, but you two are proving your idiocy more every day. So I must confess, I prefer being a educated, knowledgeable old fool than a proven idiot like you two.

And really, on this site, you're just two among many.

By: Captain Nemo on 6/9/13 at 9:58

I am afraid with your half brain (made up of crap) the definition fall to you, yogi. LOL

stupid or ridiculous person
Synonyms: ass, birdbrain, blockhead, bonehead, boob*, bore, buffoon, clod, clown, cretin*, dimwit, dolt*, dope*, dumb ox, dunce, dunderhead, easy mark, fair game, fathead, goose, halfwit, idiot, ignoramus, illiterate, imbecile, innocent, jerk*, lamebrain, lightweight, loon, moron, nerd*, nincompoop, ninny, nitwit, numskull, oaf, sap*, schlemiel, silly, simpleton, stooge, sucker, turkey, twerp, twit, victim

By: yogiman on 6/9/13 at 11:13

So you've identified yourself, eh, dumba$$. I'd say you're pretty darn accurate for a change.

By: Captain Nemo on 6/9/13 at 4:24

Poor yogi he doesn't have a brain to understand what a stupid son of a bea itch he is.